Often, parents may express certain phrases to their children without realizing how harmful they can be to their mental health. Based on this, the Huffington Post listed some damaging phrases that should be avoided when speaking to children, as follows:
1. **"It's not a big deal"**
Children often cry over things that may seem trivial to adults, prompting parents to downplay these situations with phrases like "that's not worth crying over" and "it's not a big deal." According to experts, such phrases can undermine children's genuine feelings, negatively impacting their mental health. Instead of dismissing the issue causing the child's tears, parents can try to understand the problem from the child's perspective and express interest in the child's concerns.
2. **"You never do what you're supposed to do" or "You always do this"**
Educational experts advise against using judgmental phrases like "you always do this" without informing the child what they should do instead. They recommend understanding why the child is engaging in a certain negative behavior and guiding them toward more appropriate conduct.
3. **"You make me sad when you do that"**
While it might be frustrating when a child doesn't listen, it's important not to involve your own feelings in the situation. Such emotions can carry a lot of negative energy that could affect the child's mental well-being. Experts suggest replacing emotionally charged phrases with logical and wise statements that encourage the child to stop their negative behavior.
4. **"You should know better"**
When saying something like "you should know better" to your child, you are ultimately trying to instill feelings of guilt or shame, as if implying they are "stupid." This can put the child on the defensive, potentially preventing them from following your advice and undermining their self-confidence. Experts recommend focusing on solutions for any issues the child may face instead of blaming them, and offering advice on the best ways to resolve the problem.
5. **"Let me do that for you"**
A child may struggle with some tasks parents assign to them, which might lead parents to take over the tasks instead. However, educational experts view this as a mistake and recommend allowing the child to complete the assigned tasks while providing help or guidance when they encounter difficulties.
